30. Who’s the Boss: A Primer for Parents and Pediatric Providers

Dr. Arthur Lavin returns to the podcast and offers practical advice on parent-child conflict and problem solving strategies. Tantrums are a teaching opportunity where children learn to solve the problem and parents are the guides.

Dr. Lavin shares highlights from his book “Who’s the Boss: Moving Families from Conflict to Collaboration” that he authored with colleague Susan Glaser and presents a framework to tackle tantrums and meltdowns

Let’s listen to this primer for parents and pediatric providers from Dr. Lavin!

[00:01 – 03:57] Opening Segment

  • Let’s welcome back, Dr. Arthur Lavin
  • Let’s all be cautious for a few more months
  • Listen to Arthur’s message 

[03:58 – 14:09] Teaching Children to Solve Problems

  • How Arthur turned a 12-year collab into a book
  • He did it with his colleague 
  • Teaching children to solve their problems 
  • Why Arthur likes “neutral questions”

[14:10 – 24:04] Like A Computer Freezing

  • Understand tantrums better with this analogy 
  • How to handle tantrums better
  • Arthur talks about anger flares among adults 

[24:05 – 35:40] The Line of Concern

  • The alternative to listening and problem solving 
  • Arthur shares a sneak peek about his next book
  • Listen to his message to his resident self

[35:41 – 41:38] Closing Segment

  • Finals takeaways
  • Teach children to solve problems themselves 
  • Who will find the solution, the parent or the child?
  • Adopting a neutral tone
  • Structuring conversations better
  • The approach with 100% success rate 
  • Children create the consequences, aside from solutions 
  • Tantrums are like computers freezing 
  • Teen tantrums are more complicated 

 

Tweetable Quotes:

“The secret to success always lies in finding some way to create a situation or an understanding or a stance freely whereas the child [has] the freedom and the ingenuity and the creativity to solve that problem themselves .” – Dr. Arthur Lavin

“Listen to that voice, stay close to that voice, and stay true to that voice.” – Dr. Arthur Lavin

Resources Mentioned:

Email [email protected] to connect with Arthur and visit https://www.advancedped.com/staff/ to learn more about his space.

If you’d like to connect with me, you can find me at LinkedInFacebook, and Twitter or email me at [email protected]. To learn more about me visit https://www.medicalbhs.com/

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Dr Lia Gaggino

Dr. Lia Gaggino has worked as a pediatrician for over 30 years on the west side of Michigan. During her career as a primary care physician, she has been privileged to care for children and adolescents, and know that their success is closely tied to mental wellness.

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Dr. Lia Gaggino has worked as a pediatrician for over 30 years on the west side of Michigan. During her career as a primary care physician, she has been privileged to care for children and adolescents, and know that their success is closely tied to mental wellness.

Recent Episodes

  • All Post
  • ADHD
  • Advocacy
  • Aggression and Disruptive Behaviors
  • Anxiety
  • Autism
  • Building Better Workflows
  • Depression
  • Genetics
  • healthcare disparities and inequalities
  • LGBTQIA+
  • Medications
  • Mental Health
  • OCD
  • Other
  • Pain
  • Parent/child
  • Physician Well-Being
  • Schizophrenia
  • Sexual Trauma
  • Sleep
  • Social Media
  • Substance Abuse
  • Suicide Prevention
  • Trauma

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